Happy Birth Day Eva Faith..

You are a miracle and such a perfect gift from God...(James 1:17) He blessed us incredibly by choosing us to be your mom and dad.

Your sisters adore you. Ellie can't believe how much your head is just like a peach. Emma is SO protective and doesn't want to leave your side or share you with others. Edyn isn't quite sure she is ready to give up the "baby" role but she wants to hold you lots.

Today we became a family of 6 and we feel complete.

You are beautiful. And healthy. And our hearts grew when we met you.

Born at 2:37 this morning, you weighed 6 lbs, 7 ounces and were 18 inches long. So tiny, everything about you. But yet so perfect. Dark brown hair. You sleep a lot...and you don't want to wake up to eat.

You have reminded me today of the absolute miracle of life.

Your first name, Eva- means "life" or "living one" and your middle name, Faith- means to be sure of what you hope for and certain of things you do not see.

And we pray that you will always be FULL of life and faith.

We love you SO MUCH Eva Faith...welcome to our family.

Practicing our Spanish...

Ellie is VERY MUCH into learning, so much that we got the Hooked on Phonics Set to keep the girls learning over the summer (after they finished some workbooks that we thought would serve that purpose). They are just LOVING it and it is so much fun to see their reading skills take off (well, that's how we see it of course!) At 4, Ellie is reading and spelling many words and Emma actually asked her one day how to spell a word. She told me the other day that she wanted to practice all her letters so I gave her a pencil and this pink piece of paper. She was so excited to show me her progress and when I looked I was surprised to find all these "scribbles". I asked her where her letters were and she said, "Right here, I'm just practicing my Spanish today".

A Family Babymoon...

Our family, along with our wonderful friends, the Beckmans, went on a little vacation to the Great Wolf Lodge. We are so blessed to live about 10 minutes from this awesome resort so it was a perfect ideal little "get-away" as I get closer to my due date. It was a great time waddling around in my swim-suit at 8 and a half months pregnant, making sure all 3 kids were accounted for at a large waterpark, not to mention that I am dilated to a 3 and 60% effaced and feel like a huge bomb ready to go off any moment as a family and with our friends!

Jared got a raise...

...yep, my husband, the school teacher got a raise and it barely covered this brand new cubic zirconia ring that I got on sale for $11.92 at the hospital gift shop.

I haven't been able to get my wedding ring on because my fingers are so swollen. I went to church last Sunday by myself with the 3 girls, 8 months pregnant and no wedding ring and just didn't feel quite right. And then it was worse when a male worker at Wal-Mart seemed a bit too friendly. I thought maybe he just felt sorry for me. But...I finally had to break down and buy this ring after one of my patients told me through his yellow, missing teeth (while looking at my ring finger) "So...I take it the baby's daddy AIN'T in the picture...if you ever need any help, just give me a call". Yes, it STILL makes my skin crawl!

Singing in the Rain...

...what a glorious day for singing in the rain!! The girls had a friend over for a sleepover and they woke up to a rainy day. It rained ALL morning. Finally, we decided to let them go outside and play in the rain and of course, they had a blast. They turned up the radio and danced away...

A Shower for Baby E

Yesterday my friend Lindsay hosted a diaper & wipe shower to shower baby girl #4! And baby E is pretty set on diapers & wipes for awhile (& I'm so thankful I don't have to venture out to the store to buy them with 4 kids, 6 & under!)

She is so creative...she made an "advice tree" where everyone wrote words of advice on a little circle and hung it on a tree. Check out some of the advice :)





Thank you so much to my friends & family for coming and helping us celebrate our newest addition. You have blessed our family!

Sometimes I just need a little "sharpening"...

I'm so blessed to have such amazing friends...it seems they all serve a purpose in my life (hmm...I think that might be a "God-thing"). There are the friends who affirm me, the ones that keep me accountable, others to just LAUGH with (but of course, they are all fun!), others to sharpen me and the list could go on. Sometimes the best friends are those that you don't talk to often but when you do, you can just pick up where you left off like there was never a huge gap or an EMBARRASSINGLY LONG time since you last connected. One of those friends shared this on her blog a while back and although I had "skimmed over it" it before, it meant something so different to me reading it a few years later...or...I'm sure it was just more convicting than it had ever been to me. Yep, this is a long one, (and...I had to read it slow to "get it" because I'm not used to the "thou art hast thee" words) but it pretty much covers everything. Thank you Trisha for sharing this and sharpening me. It made me miss you terribly!!

Calvary Love
by Amy Carmichael

If I belittle those whom I am called to serve, talk of their weak points in contrast perhaps with what I think of as my strong points; if I adopt a superior attitude, forgetting "Who made thee to differ? And what hast thou that thou hast not received?" then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I find myself taking lapses for granted, "Oh, that's what they always do," "Oh, of course she talks like that, he acts like that," then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I can enjoy a joke at the expense of another; if I can in any way slight another in conversation, or even in thought, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I can write an unkind letter, speak an unkind word, think an unkind thought without grief and shame, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I do not feel far more for the grieved Savior than for my worried self when troublesome things occur, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I can rebuke without a pang, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If my attitude be one of fear, not faith, about one who has disappointed me; if I say, "Just what I expected" if a fall occurs, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I am afraid to speak the truth, lest I lose affection, or lest the one concerned should say, "You do not understand," or because I fear to lose my reputation for kindness; if I put my own good name before the other's highest good, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I am content to heal a hurt slightly, saying "Peace, peace," where there is no peace; if I forget the poignant word "Let love be without dissimulation" and blunt the edge of truth, speaking not right things but smooth things, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I hold on to choices of any kind, just because they are my choice, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I am soft to myself and slide comfortably into self-pity and self-sympathy; If I do not by the grace of God practice fortitude, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I myself dominate myself, if my thoughts revolve round myself, if I am so occupied with myself I rarely have "a heart at leisure from itself," then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If, the moment I am conscious of the shadow of self crossing my threshold, I do not shut the door, and keep that door shut, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I cannot in honest happiness take the second place (or the twentieth); if I cannot take the first without making a fuss about my unworthiness, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I take offense easily, if I am content to continue in a cool unfriendliness, though friendship be possible, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I feel injured when another lays to my charge things that I know not, forgetting that my sinless Savior trod this path to the end, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I feel bitter toward those who condemn me, as it seems to me, unjustly, forgetting that if they knew me as I know myself they would condemn me much more, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If souls can suffer alongside, and I hardly know it, because the spirit of discernment is not in me, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If the praise of others elates me and their blame depresses me; if I cannot rest under misunderstanding without defending myself; if I love to be loved more than to love, to be served more than to serve, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I crave hungrily to be used to show the way of liberty to a soul in bondage, instead of caring only that it be delivered; if I nurse my disappointment when I fail, instead of asking that to another the word of release may be given, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I do not forget about such a trifle as personal success, so that it never crosses my mind, or if it does, is never given room there; if the cup of flattery tastes sweet to me, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If in the fellowship of service I seek to attach a friend to myself, so that others are caused to feel unwanted; if my friendships do not draw others deeper in, but are ungenerous (to myself, for myself), then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I refuse to allow one who is dear to me to suffer for the sake of Christ, if I do not see such suffering as the greatest honor that can be offered to any follower of the Crucified, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I slip into the place that can be filled by Christ alone, making myself the first necessity to a soul instead of leading it to fasten upon Him, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If my interest in the work of others is cool; if I think in terms of my own special work; if the burdens of others are not my burdens too, and their joys mine, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I wonder why something trying is allowed, and press for prayer that it may be removed; if I cannot be trusted with any disappointment, and cannot go on in peace under any mystery, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If the ultimate, the hardest, cannot be asked of me; if my fellows hesitate to ask it and turn to someone else, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I covet any place on earth but the dust at the foot of the Cross, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

That which I know not, teach Thou me, O Lord, my God.

the fourth.

I hope your day is filled with the fun that comes from living in a country where we have been granted so much freedom. This pretty much sums up our day...church, fireworks, homemade ice cream, a parade, grilling out, family, friends, dancing in the rain, homemade ice cream, the excitement and anticipation of the "big fireworks" from 3 little girls, some cute (& not so cute) "patriotic" outfits, watermelon, outside pedicure for a big pregnant mama from my cousin, dunk tanks, a bounce house, twizzlers, red, white & blue, swimming, did I mention homemade ice cream?









Of course, a special thank you to all the brave men and women who have sacrificed their lives for our country. And to the families of these soldiers...you have sacrificed too. And to our own VERY special soldier, my brother Curtis. We are so proud of you for being so brave, risking your life by serving our country so willingly and whole-heartedly. We love you Uncle "Turtis".

Off to Grandma & Papa's house they go....take 2.

My parents willingly (& bravely) took all 3 girls for 4 nights and 5 days and although the "break" was nice and we got SO MUCH done, we missed them and just can't imagine life without them! Our house was SO QUIET...almost too quiet. When we picked up, organized and cleaned it stayed that way...imagine that! However within 5 minutes of them getting home (& pulling out everything from their suitcases) we could no longer see the floor. Yes, it was great to have them home again :)
They had a blast and keep talking about Papa Tom's garden, going fishing and swimming. My mom had them stemming green beans and eating peas out of the pods, and they had a blast just picking veggies out of the garden(some of the things that I loved and remembered doing as a child).

 

 

 

Thank you for taking them...they had so much fun and made some great memories they will never forget.

I'm a Barbie Girl...

...in a Barbie World...

...washing my Barbie Jeep.

Dad was afraid they would want to put their Bikinis on while they did this...better now than later, right?

A big day for Emma...and me too.

Emma had her 4th swim meet of the season on Wednesday and it was at another lake. This one was even more intimidating than the first. First of all, it was much bigger and second of all the dock was so far above the water, at first glance we thought she would have to jump in from very high up on the dock. Thankfully this was not the case. I could just see the fear and anxiety in her little eyes as she frantically bit her nails.
We checked the schedule to look at her line-up of events and found out she would be doing the free-style relay with the 8 year olds. She was then to do the freestyle on her own, the backstroke, then her coach informed her she would be doing the medley relay with the 8 year olds, swimming first with the backstroke. Yes, there was quite the rush of anxiety in ME as I watched her go into total freak-out mode. Then to top it off she asked, "But mommy, what if I turn over (doing the backstroke), or hit the ropes, then the "BIG GIRLS" will be mad at me for not getting a ribbon?" My eyes started to well up with tears and I wanted to tell her that something like that would NEVER happen. But I couldn't. I couldn't do anything but fight back the tears and keep my smile pasted on as I wondered about her heart and mind as she faced such anxiety. All I could do was think, "I get it girl. I understand. I too am anxious about things...and scared sometimes...and insecure...and fearful...I really do get it".

Part of me was thinking, "Wow, this is no big deal...this pregnancy sure is making me emotional....she is a first-child, she just gets nervous a lot...this is just her personality." Then another part of me was wondering if this was going to be some scarring, life-changing moment for her that would cause even more anxiety for her for years to come. My heart just broke for what could have happened as her AMAZING coach grabbed her hand to take her out to the docks and I silently prayed that no matter what happened God would protect her heart.

It saddens my heart to know that I cannot protect my girls from anxiety, worry, heartbreak and just pain in general. Yes, this may sound dramatic and silly coming from a mom who is 8 months pregnant but as a mom, I want to protect them. Parenting teaches me about Gods love for us. And how He longs to protect us but sometimes we just have to stumble and fall to learn and grow. And He is always there to comfort us, just as I will always strive to be there to comfort my girls when they stumble and fall. While I want to protect my girls, I also want them to have every opportunity to find their God-given talents and abilities so that HE can use them for HIS glory. It's just that with every experience there is the potential of disappointment and failure which can have a HUGE impact on who we are and become, how we view life, how we relate to others, and even how we view a God that loves us and truly does want what is best for us.

So...as you might have already guessed...Emma gets it from me...fear and anxiety still creep at the door of my heart. As much as I constantly try to guard my heart (Proverbs 4:23), I am daily reminded of all the PAIN that is present as a result of living in a fallen world and I sometimes think, "When is it going to have to be MY turn?...Life is just SO GOOD, surely there is going to be MAJOR heartbreak, loss or pain around the corner." (I know, terrible thoughts I have sometimes...)

I'm so thankful that God is quick to remind me in His word that this is NOT His heart. While His purpose for our life is to make us Holy, it does NOT have to involve such tragedy. But I ask myself frequently, "What if it does?" So...I just have to CHOOSE EVERY DAY to remind myself that I am covered by His grace and my response to that should be to trust HIM in all things and lean NOT on my own (VERY limited) understanding. (Proverbs 3:5-6) He loves me and He has rescued me more than once from the mud and mire and given me a firm place to stand...(Psalm 40:2) while offering peace...and hope. And so everyday as my heart battles to comprehend how much God can love me, I will choose to believe in these truths.

To my girls...I will always pray that no matter what circumstance you are faced with in this life, you will make the choice EVERY DAY to believe in God's grace, His incredible LOVE for you and the truth that HOPE is available for your choosing.

Whoa...did I mention I was 8 months pregnant??


On a lighter note, my girl did INCREDIBLE in ALL of her events, did not turn over OR hit the ropes in her backstroke races and came home with 3 ribbons! (two Third place and one second!) And I was just proud of her for jumping in and overcoming such anxiety :)