Tuesday, March 30, 2010

If only I could just...

...get through this week. I have been saying that for SEVERAL weeks now. And I feel like there are so many days when I am SO unproductive in being a mom and wife, that I tell myself, "I am going to do better." Tomorrow I will wake up early and have some awesome and teachable time with God. Tomorrow I will work with Emma on her reading, Ellie on her letter sounds, Edyn on her colors and shapes. And I will eat healthy and get back on that dreaded treadmill or go for a walk. And tomorrow I will make sure to go through the resurrection eggs again because it is my responsibility to make sure the girls FULLY understand the Easter story and what Jesus did for them on the cross. And when Ellie asks me 20 more questions about Jesus dying on the cross, I will have all the answers. And I will have a clean, organized house. I will have updated our blog with all the pictures I took time to take of the girls in their Easter dresses. I will have Emma's party planned and ready to go. I will be all caught up on my responsibilities for MOPS. And have all my e-mails and phone calls responded to. I will have dinner on the table when Jared gets home (that isn't boxed chicken or frozen pizza). And laundry done. And I will get out of my pajamas, have showered and put make-up on. I won't yell at my girls when they spray canned cheese all over the carpet and I have to scrub carpet for over an hour and use an entire can of carpet cleaner. (But then again, what kind of mom would allow their children to get a hold of 2 cans of spray cheese??) And my kids won't be running around in mismatched clothes. Or naked.

Yes, that's the person I strive to be. To have it all together. Then I realize how much I can't stand that girl too. The one who ALWAYS has it all together.

Is it really possible? No and that is NOT the kind of girl God called me to be.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Thank you Jesus for reminding me of this truth. Help me to rest in your grace as I experience my share of daily mess-ups and mishaps and just plain terrible parenting moments. And remind me that YOUR power is MADE PERFECT in MY WEAKNESS. Because as much as I try to do this mommy-thing alone, I can't. And I shouldn't. It's not good for my kids. Or for my relationship with you, Jesus.